Losing my Mind ??

I think I might be going crazy…


D-dad got up earlier than usual today to go to work – he woke me at 6am and said – “I tested Eden since you didn’t test her in the middle of the night – she was 260”


Sleepily I say – “Yes I did” – check my phone for the last alarm that was set and it was 3am


He said it wasn’t recorded in her blood glucose meter and asked what she tested.. As I sleepily tried to recall the BS number in my head – I said “it must not have auto-transmitted – maybe she was on top of her pump”


An hour later – showered and a bit more awake I can think a bit clearer.. 


That statement did NOT make sense – Her meter holds all the results but it sometimes won’t transmit to her PUMP..  hmmmm…. I check the meter myself and don’t understand ..


I clearly REMEMBER getting up at 12am and 3am


I remember checking her at 9.30pm – she was still awake with the light on and reading

I remember checking her at 12am – being happy with the number and going back to bed resetting my alarm

I remember checking her at 3am – she was in a different sleeping position and I had trouble getting to her fingers to test her blood sugar.

I remember getting a drink of water – going to the bathroom and then having trouble getting back to sleep.

I remember thinking of a really catchy headline for a blog post and thinking – I really need to keep a pad of paper next to the bed – but I will remember it in the morning.. Do I remember – nope


But there is NO RECORD that I actually DID test Eden at 3am. Am I going completely crazy? By some fluke did her blood sugar number not record in her meter? NEVER had that happen before… 

Did I DREAM getting up and testing Eden at 3am?

The water glass is sitting on the kitchen counter right where I left it? Did I do that at 12am and not 3am?

Am I completely losing my mind? 


Guess we will never really know… But it SCARES me – scares me because I was the one who was completely responsible for Eden’s care last night and the “what-ifs” creep into my mind. Eden had 2 basketball games yesterday afternoon – meaning a possibility of a low blood sugar crash in the middle of the night.


Nothing seems to make sense to me right now – except Eden’s high 260 reading at 6am ..


Eden just came to me with her pump and pump site in hand – once again her site came out at some point through the night / early morning. Blood sugar reading – 1 hour later at 7.15am – 324 … oh yay..


Happy Monday everyone! T1D has thrown down a challenge already today… better get myself another cup of coffee…


2 thoughts on “Losing my Mind ??

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